MAKING THE MOST OF “SHELTERING AT HOME”

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Cliff Poe
April 1, 2020 Shelter-in-Place

The word that we continue to hear associated with Covid-19 is “unprecedented.”  Yes, the challenges and difficulties associated with this pandemic are unprecedented, but the opportunities are also unprecedented!  Instead of thinking, “We have to shelter at home,” try thinking, “We get to shelter at home.”  Following are some ideas to help you and your family make the most of the opportunities.  There are four categories of opportunities with suggestions for you to try:  Relational, Educational, Entertainment and Fitness.

RELATIONAL OPPORTUNITIES
  • Suspend all judgement –Living in close quarters for extended periods of time can be hard on relationships. One of the temptations associated with “sheltering in place” is that we can begin to be picky and judgmental of our mate. Small personality annoyances that we would normally not address, we now feel that we have to correct.  We can also begin to judge our partner’s habits, food choices and amounts consumed and reading or viewing choices.  Stop it!  Suspend all judgement… and that includes being less critical of yourself. 
  • Be kind. It has been said that kindness is love in action.  This is your opportunity to show real love to your family or spouse by practicing acts of unexpected kindness.  Make sure their devices are charged, do a chore that they would normally do, write your partner a love letter, etc. For a listing of 50 ideas on how to be kind and/or spark your romance, click here: LoveRecon’s 50 Creative Ways to Love Your Mate
  • Practice the art of communication. Grab a cup of coffee, tea or your favorite beverage and sit face to face with one another, making good eye contact.  Share what you admire or appreciate about each other.  (To admire is to point out a character quality.  To appreciate is to say “thank you” for something they have done.)  2. Share the high and low points of the day for you and your mate will do the same.  3. Talk about how you’re doing with the “shelter in place” and what you could do to make the most of the time. 4. Make a plan for the day or next day. 
  • Make the effort to get dressed! Perhaps you’ve seen the posting on social media: “Its 7:00 PM. Time to change from my day pajamas to my night pajamas.”  Don’t let your personal care go by the wayside. Your appearance matters.  Make the effort to dress in a way that is attractive to your mate. 
  • Give Four 10-Second Hugs Daily. When you get up in the morning, give each other a 10-second morning hug. Around mid-day, do it again.  In the late afternoon or early evening, do it again. And before you go to bed, give a final hug. Research has shown that bonding hormones and endorphines are released when we hug.  Try it and see if the atmosphere in your home doesn’t improve along with your sense of love and well-being. And don’t just hug your mate, hug your kids, too!   
EDUCATIONAL OPPORTUNITIES
  • Rent an E-book, look up articles, or visit your local library online.
  • Visit PBS and PBS Teaching Materials for ideas on educating children during their time away from school.
  • Learn a new skill like coding and coding for children.
  • Learn more about the oceans with different educational materials for children.
  • With pretty much every subject available, Khan Academy is amazing for these no school times.
  • Want an educational scavenger hunt you can do in your own backyard? Here is a biodiversity bingo card! Kids can look around their backyard or local green space and try to find enough biodiversity for bingo.
  • Homeschooling can be tough. Bluprint, a homeschooling website, is offering free classes till April 9 to ease that difficulty.
  • Why not teach your children, or yourself, to cook? Check out these several mostly-free cooking lessons for yourself.  For cooking with kids, here are several YouTube videos to help.
ENTERTAINMENT OPPORTUNITIES
FITNESS

Find your new favorite at-home routine on Youtube.
Visit Planet Fitness’s Facebook page at 4:00 pm PT, 5:00 pm MT, 6:00 pm CT or 7:00 pm ET  for their daily free online class!
You don’t have to be there in person to work out with OrangeTheory Online on YouTube!
Get outside and take a walk, do yoga, go for a jog, or visit one of the open spaces around you. Just remember to stay 6ft away from people, wash your hands, and don’t touch your face!

Hopefully these ideas will stimulate other ideas for you and your mate and/or family to try.  In this time of unprecedented opportunities, make the most of them!

If you should feel that you need help, especially relationally, please take advantage of the offer of a confidential and free coaching session as a gift from Recon Coaching. You can contact us by phone at 866-218-1716 or email at reconcoaching@loverecon.org.

Find out about our marriage seminars and how LoveRecon can help you move forward together in a much better light.

  • How can we improve communication in our relationship?

    Improving communication starts with active listening. Make sure to give your partner your full attention when they’re speaking. Avoid interrupting and show empathy towards their feelings. Regularly check in with each other about your needs and feelings, and set aside time for meaningful conversations without distractions.

  • What should we do if we have different interests?

    It’s natural for couples to have different interests. Embrace your individuality while finding common activities you both enjoy. Respect and support each other’s hobbies and passions. You can also try introducing each other to your interests and see if there are new things you might both enjoy together.

  • How can we keep the romance alive after many years together?

    Keeping the romance alive requires effort from both partners. Plan regular date nights, surprise each other with thoughtful gestures, and maintain physical affection. Communication is key—express your love and appreciation for each other frequently. Also, make time for new experiences and adventures together to keep the relationship exciting.

  • What is the best way to handle disagreements and conflicts?

    Handling disagreements requires calm and respectful communication. Focus on the issue at hand without resorting to personal attacks. Use “I” statements to express your feelings and needs without blaming your partner. Find a compromise or solution that works for both of you, and don’t be afraid to seek help from a therapist if needed.

  • How can we build trust in our relationship?

    Building trust takes time and consistency. Be honest and transparent with each other, and follow through on your commitments. Show reliability and dependability in both big and small matters. Address any breaches of trust openly and work together to rebuild it. Trust is reinforced through consistent actions and open communication.