MEN: HOW TO BE MORE ATTRACTIVE TO YOUR MATE

Part One: 10 Tips to Be More Attractive to Her

In this two-part blog, we will look at what it means to make yourself as a man more attractive to your mate.  By far, the most critical factors that make you attractive to her are your character qualities and traits. Typically, a woman will look past your physical shortcomings and make allowances for them if she loves you.  But why should she have to? What if you could make yourself attractive to her so that you would stimulate her desire for you?  Wouldn’t it be great if she wanted you… really wanted you instead of just accepting you?

When your mate was first attracted to you, certain physical qualities and attributes played a role in that attraction.  For instance, she may have appreciated the way that you dressed or the fact that you were physically fit and had a sexy posterior!  Your hair, facial hair, or cleanly shaved face may have turned her on. Your scent may have been pleasurable to her. As the years progress and physical changes happen, however, it can become easy to let your appearance and hygiene habits slide.  A groomer once told this author that “older male cats stop bathing themselves.”  I have often thought about this when I am tempted to not exert the effort to maintain my own physical appeal to my mate.

Below are listed 10 things that you can do that will help you to be more physically attractive to her. You may be tempted to think that these don’t apply to a “man’s man,” but before you discount them, ask your mate what she thinks!

1. Take regular showers/baths. This doesn’t mean that you have to shower or bathe every day unless you work in an environment that causes you to be sweaty and dirty or do a daily workout. The idea is to be fresh and not smell of body odor or other odors that you have absorbed throughout the day.  It only takes a few minutes, and what woman is not more welcoming to a clean man going to bed with her?

2. Trim toenails as well as fingernails. Guys, we’re usually pretty good about clipping our fingernails, but what about those toenails? What effect do you think that your Wolverine toe-claws will have when they scrape up against your mate in bed? Trim those toenails about every two to three weeks.

3. Treat your “bacne.” A significant number of men develop acne on their shoulders and upper back, hence the term “bacne.” Be sure to scrub your back and use the soap and treatment that you use on facial acne.

4. Take care of your mouth. It is surprising the number of women who say that their man doesn’t brush his teeth. The mouth is a breeding ground for bacteria and disease. It is also one of the most intimate parts of your body.  Why would your lady want to kiss a mouth that hasn’t been cleaned in weeks?

• Brush your teeth at least once a day, preferably before bed.
• Floss to remove any food debris that has accumulated between your teeth.
• Use mints, gum, or mouthwash to freshen your breath, especially after a meal and before you kiss.

5. Be clean “all under.” Sure, there’s plenty of jokes about “skid marks” in men’s underwear. Still, a dirty undercarriage is not a laughing matter to your mate. Be careful to clean yourself thoroughly “all under,” for health reasons and physical appeal. 

6. Trim your hair – everywhere!

• Maintain your beard. If you have facial hair, keep it clean and conditioned. You don’t want your mate’s delicate skin to be chafed when your faces touch.
• Regular hair care – By all means, keep your hair clean and, if needed, conditioned. Whether you wear your hair long or short, regularly have it trimmed or cut to maintain your mane’s health and appearance.
• Shave regularly and/or trim your beard. Whether you are clean-shaven, sporting a “scruff” or a full beard, you will need to give your facial hair regular attention to maintain its appeal.
• Shave your neck. Nothing is quite like the hot towels and neck shave at the barbershop. But you don’t have to wait for the barber.  Get some hot towels, lather up your neck, and clean away all the fuzz and renegade neck hairs.  Or better yet, have your sweetheart shave your neck for you!
• Maintain your eyebrows. Most men prefer natural eyebrows. The key is to trim any wild, wiry hairs. You may want to shape them a bit with a razor or even have someone do it for you if you have thick or bushy eyebrows.
• Trim hair in your ears and nose. You want to trim any hairs that are sticking out of your ears or nose. You don’t want to try to eliminate all nasal hair since it serves health purposes.
• Manscape? Have a conversation and find out how she feels about body hair. Does she want you to trim your armpits?  What about other parts of your body?  It’s a matter of personal preference – hers and yours.

7. Appeal to Her Sense of Smell Most women are sensitive to smells and odors. To make yourself more attractive to her:

• Shower with a soap that she likes.
• Wear her favorite cologne, especially if she bought it for you!
• Definitely use a deodorant that works with your body chemistry. 

8. Maintain and manage your health. Taking care of your health will give her a sense of security and peace and raise her appreciation for you. You can do this by:

• Get regular checkups. A regular periodic checkup and an annual physical will keep you on top of most medical issues.  Be sure to have your testosterone levels tested, especially if you are experiencing lack of energy, an increase in belly fat, and/or a decrease in your libido.
• Don’t put off going to the doctor. If something happens and you are tempted to ignore it and hope that it will go away, don’t! Go to the doctor or the health clinic and be checked out.  
• Watch your weight. Maintain a healthy weight for you. A big belly can make sexual intercourse with your mate difficult and even painful.  “Clean” foods and portion control can help as well as the many programs available to educate you and help you adopt a healthy eating lifestyle.
• Exercise will improve your mental and physical health and even make you more appealing and energetic for those special times of lovemaking. Working out together can also increase your attractiveness to your mate. It can be something as simple as walking together and engaging in a conversation.

9. Pay attention to your wardrobe. This doesn’t mean that you have to spend a fortune and wear designer clothes. Simply wear clothes that fit and that are not tattered and stained. Resist the temptation to always put on that same old t-shirt and jogger pants or athletic shorts. Take pride in your appearance.  Find out what she likes to see you in and wear it on a date or a special occasion to please her. 

10. Ask her! It never hurts to ask her what would make you more attractive to her. Just the knowledge that you care and that you want to please her should make you more attractive to her!

If you are struggling in your relationship and feel that your mate is no longer attracted to you, it may be time to seek marriage help.  Don’t wait until it’s too late. Reach out now!  

• How can we improve communication in our relationship?

  Improving communication starts with active listening. Make sure to give your partner your full attention when they’re speaking. Avoid interrupting and show empathy towards their feelings. Regularly check in with each other about your needs and feelings, and set aside time for meaningful conversations without distractions.

• What should we do if we have different interests?

  It’s natural for couples to have different interests. Embrace your individuality while finding common activities you both enjoy. Respect and support each other’s hobbies and passions. You can also try introducing each other to your interests and see if there are new things you might both enjoy together.

• How can we keep the romance alive after many years together?

  Keeping the romance alive requires effort from both partners. Plan regular date nights, surprise each other with thoughtful gestures, and maintain physical affection. Communication is key—express your love and appreciation for each other frequently. Also, make time for new experiences and adventures together to keep the relationship exciting.

• What is the best way to handle disagreements and conflicts?

  Handling disagreements requires calm and respectful communication. Focus on the issue at hand without resorting to personal attacks. Use “I” statements to express your feelings and needs without blaming your partner. Find a compromise or solution that works for both of you, and don’t be afraid to seek help from a therapist if needed.

• How can we build trust in our relationship?

  Building trust takes time and consistency. Be honest and transparent with each other, and follow through on your commitments. Show reliability and dependability in both big and small matters. Address any breaches of trust openly and work together to rebuild it. Trust is reinforced through consistent actions and open communication.