The 3 A’s – A Couple in Crisis

The 3 A’s – A Couple in Crisis

Most crisis couples that attend the Love Recon Intensive are dealing with one or more of the 3 A’s listed below. In this blog, we will address the definitions and symptoms of knowing when your relationship is nearing crisis status.  In addition, what to do when your mate cannot or will not acknowledge when you nearing the dangerous make or break point. Furthermore, we will give you tools and resources for finding help and resolution to crisis issues in your relationship.

What are the 3 A’s ?

1. Affairs – Emotion or Physical
2. Addictions
3. Abusive Behaviors

Affairs: Emotional and  Physical

Affairs or developing a emotional attachment outside of your relationship is a symptom of
disconnection that happened way before the affair began.

Most affairs start innocently and without consideration of how will harm the relationship.

Healing from an affair starts with a CONSCIOUS decision to invest in your relationship with time,
forgiveness, and action to repair the broken trust.

Step 1: DISCONNECT from all communication with the outside relationship

Step 2: Enlist help from a counselor, clergy, or experienced marriage program like Love Recon for a safe place work through your repair

Step 3: Be patient with the process

Addictions: All Types of Addictions

Addictions are not limited to drugs and alcohol, any obsessive behavior that jeopardizes your relationship and health could qualify as an addiction.

It’s very likely time to see help, if you have had your loved ones express concerns about your addiction and or you hide those behaviors in shame.

Mates can gain VALUABLE tools and need to see tools in a way to be SUPPORTIVE of their SPOUSE’S recovery journey.

Step 1: Find a resource, sponsor, and a support group for both the one in recovery and spouse

Step 2: Be open to exploring WHAT may be behind the addiction behaviors

Step 3: Be patient with the process

Abusive Behaviors

Abusive is defined as behaviors that alienate, defame, or harm a person’s body or soul.

It’s a common myth that only women can be victims of abuse in their relationship.

Another myth is that only individuals that witnessed abuse in their childhoods will accept abuse in their adult relationships. Many adults that tend to have high empathy fall prey to accepting abuse from their mates.

Finally, we have seen great success when mates address their anger issues and find healthy ways to communicate without abusive actions or words.

Step 1: Seek help if you are being harmed in your relationship

Step 2: Take action steps to work through anger issues and boundaries to make the relationship healthy again

Resource links

Love Recon Intensive Marriage Retreat offers a 4 day intensive program for couples in crisis and a 2 day Love -n- Life Enrichment program for all other couples.  What’s more both programs create a safe environment for you and your mate to address crisis issues or everyday issues in your relationship.

A Powerful part of the program is that you will be attending with other couples dealing with similar issues. Whether attending the Love Recon Intensive dealing with the 3 A’s or attending Love & Life Enrichment dealing with every day relational issues. Either way you will be encouraged and learning the tools first hand required to heal and reconnect in a powerful way.

Addiction Resources

Locate your local AA, NA and Al-Anon groups:

https://www.samhsa.gov/find-help/national-helpline

Porn Addiction Resource:

https://fightthenewdrug.org/

Email a Love Recon Coach/Director:

You can connect confidentially with a LoveRecon master certified Coach at
ReconCoaching@loverecon.org

Seek a board certified counselor in your area.  You can search for counselors online in your area, or ask friends for references.

• How can we improve communication in our relationship?

  Improving communication starts with active listening. Make sure to give your partner your full attention when they’re speaking. Avoid interrupting and show empathy towards their feelings. Regularly check in with each other about your needs and feelings, and set aside time for meaningful conversations without distractions.

• What should we do if we have different interests?

  It’s natural for couples to have different interests. Embrace your individuality while finding common activities you both enjoy. Respect and support each other’s hobbies and passions. You can also try introducing each other to your interests and see if there are new things you might both enjoy together.

• How can we keep the romance alive after many years together?

  Keeping the romance alive requires effort from both partners. Plan regular date nights, surprise each other with thoughtful gestures, and maintain physical affection. Communication is key—express your love and appreciation for each other frequently. Also, make time for new experiences and adventures together to keep the relationship exciting.

• What is the best way to handle disagreements and conflicts?

  Handling disagreements requires calm and respectful communication. Focus on the issue at hand without resorting to personal attacks. Use “I” statements to express your feelings and needs without blaming your partner. Find a compromise or solution that works for both of you, and don’t be afraid to seek help from a therapist if needed.

• How can we build trust in our relationship?

  Building trust takes time and consistency. Be honest and transparent with each other, and follow through on your commitments. Show reliability and dependability in both big and small matters. Address any breaches of trust openly and work together to rebuild it. Trust is reinforced through consistent actions and open communication.