The Benefits of Dreaming with Your Spouse

Dreaming with Your Spouse

Do you and your spouse dream together? I’m not talking about the dreams you have when you are sleeping, but the kind of dreaming you do together as life partners about your future. There are many reasons that this will strengthen your connection as a couple.

The benefits of dreaming together

Dreaming has a beneficial effect on your relationship. Dreaming with your partner will…

• Strengthen your heart bond and your commitment to each other. After all, if you plan for a future together, it implies that you anticipate being together for that hopeful future.
• Create intimacy. You are seeing into your spouse’s heart, and they are expressing their innermost thoughts to you.
• Build you into a team. Dreaming together creates unity for reaching goals in the accomplishment of your dreams.
• Clarify what is important. Your shared vision will help you to define the purpose of your marriage.
• Help you do the right thing. When you have a vision for your finances, a vision for your children, and a vision for what your marriage will produce in thirty years, it automatically causes you to behave in such a way that will bring it about.
• Spark the flame of romance! Couples who dream together are deeply in love.
• Energize you and your passion. Your internal drive will be activated, and your passion for life will be renewed.
• Create synergy between you. What you can do together is infinitely greater than what you can do individually.
• Help you weather storms. Having a shared vision will encourage you during difficult times. The vision that you have dreamed and created together is the stable thing when nothing else is stable.

Start dreaming today

In which areas do we want to set and pursue goals?  
What do we want our life to look like in five, ten, and 20 years?
What are our dream trips and vacations?
What can we do as a couple to impact our community and world?
What kind of legacy do we want to leave?

As you answer these questions and begin to dream and set goals, remember that dreaming is less about the outcome and more about your journey with your spouse. You are sharing your hearts and your lives with each other. Your dreams may turn out differently than you had envisioned, but you will have built a life together that is uniquely yours.

Dream Killers

As you dream and envision your future, some forces and factors will work against accomplishing your dreams. Some of these are internal, and others are external.

• While families can be great supporters of your dreams and encourage you when it gets tough, they can also be dream killers. They may be uncomfortable with your dreams. They see you as their child and don’t want you to rock the boat. Their lack of belief in your vision could cause you to doubt yourselves.
• If your friends do not have positive attitudes and are not motivated to grow and set dreams themselves, they will likely discourage you from accomplishing yours. Surround yourselves with go-getters whom you can encourage and who can encourage you.
• Fatigue can cause your dream to shrink and fade if you let it. Don’t give up on the dream. Get some rest!
• You may fail at times in the accomplishment of your dreams. In fact, you will fail. Learn what you need to learn from your failures and keep moving forward. “Fail forward” and use the experience as a lesson.
• You may be afraid of failure. You may be afraid of success. Nothing has the potential to kill your dreams like fear does. There will be problems and risks with every dream that you have. The fatal mistake is to give in to fear instead of trusting in yourselves, each other, and God.

Don’t let anything or anyone cause you to give up on your dreams.  Dream and dream big!

If you are hurting or struggling in your relationship, it will be difficult to dream or envision your future together. Love Recon marriage retreats and seminars and Recon coaching can help. It’s what we do!

• How can we improve communication in our relationship?

  Improving communication starts with active listening. Make sure to give your partner your full attention when they’re speaking. Avoid interrupting and show empathy towards their feelings. Regularly check in with each other about your needs and feelings, and set aside time for meaningful conversations without distractions.

• What should we do if we have different interests?

  It’s natural for couples to have different interests. Embrace your individuality while finding common activities you both enjoy. Respect and support each other’s hobbies and passions. You can also try introducing each other to your interests and see if there are new things you might both enjoy together.

• How can we keep the romance alive after many years together?

  Keeping the romance alive requires effort from both partners. Plan regular date nights, surprise each other with thoughtful gestures, and maintain physical affection. Communication is key—express your love and appreciation for each other frequently. Also, make time for new experiences and adventures together to keep the relationship exciting.

• What is the best way to handle disagreements and conflicts?

  Handling disagreements requires calm and respectful communication. Focus on the issue at hand without resorting to personal attacks. Use “I” statements to express your feelings and needs without blaming your partner. Find a compromise or solution that works for both of you, and don’t be afraid to seek help from a therapist if needed.

• How can we build trust in our relationship?

  Building trust takes time and consistency. Be honest and transparent with each other, and follow through on your commitments. Show reliability and dependability in both big and small matters. Address any breaches of trust openly and work together to rebuild it. Trust is reinforced through consistent actions and open communication.